December 31, 2014

Love is about opening your heart to possibilities

Cham asked me if I found a job overseas or "Eat, Pray, Love"?

It took me a while to answer then I realized that maybe she meant I'll have to try my luck.

"Eat, Pray, Love", I replied, laughing. 

It made me think about that phrase. I don't know what is going to happen right when I step my foot on another territory -- a new country. Then, I took it too seriously that, well, my life would be literally "eat, pray, and love." Love? I'd probably eat for sure. Pray... yes. Love because? I am not going there to find love. I am not going there to fall in love. For sure, that's not the goal

To look much deeper, maybe the word love means something more than what I thought at first. Love is about opening my heart to possibilities. To embrace the changes. The big changes. The serious changes. The possibilities are endless.

December 27, 2014

Postcard Collaboration: Postcard # 10 (Wesseling, Germany)

Sonnet poetry: D.G. Bersabal
Photograph: Cosettex

As I walk towards the beach
I see these tiny orange flowers.
Little trumpets with a unique melody in each
They’re not even tired of playing for hours.
The sea breeze may blow away
their masterpiece,
but the melody always finds a way
to deliver kisses of peace.
Someone took a photo of them.
So still, but I can imagine the way they dance.
In my mind, they’re swaying to their anthem.
Oh, what a lovely dose of romance!
So every time I go to the beach, I’d stopover
because they’re part of my life forever.

*postcard sent to A. Kogler

December 23, 2014

Postcard Collaboration: Postcard # 9 (Riedstadt, Germany)

Playful Silhouettes
Limerick poetry: D.G. Bersabal
Photograph: Jeansman

There was a little boy named Baloo
Who always play around with his friends of two.
They are having fun
under the bright sun
in a paradise where playful silhouettes sings ‘yahoo’!

*postcard sent to M. De Cesare

December 19, 2014

Postcard Collaboration: Postcard # 8 (Leipzig, Germany)

Winter Oak

Iambic Pentameter poetry: D.G. Bersabal
Photograph: Rob Roy Aus

Through the range of hills in Southwest England,
lies an oak tree standing very firmly.
Does not fail to give its glowing beauty;
even during winter months it looks grand.

*postcard sent to E. Bischoff

December 15, 2014

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer makes me reminisce my adventures as a child. So, it's probably the reason why I liked reading it though it took me a while to finish it. It's not an easy read as I thought it was but nevertheless it was worth the time. I enjoyed the mischiefs Tom did together with his friends. All those risky situations he was in and bravely stood up to be responsible as possible. There was character development somehow for Tom. I have only two adjectives for Tom: mischievous and adventurous! Dear Tom, I know how it feels to struggle and make everyone know you're good but in the end they still see you as bad as ever. Haha! Cheers, Tom!

Twain brought me to the world that's somehow familiar to me. The story about Tom, his friends, and their adventures brings so much nostalgia. Overall, it's exciting and a good read. Cheers to all childhood & future adventures!

December 11, 2014

Ice Breaker #4: Which of your parents' rule do you appreciate the most? Why?

All I can do right now is to remember the good old days with my parents when they were still alive and when I was young & in my early teens. As far as I could remember, my parents were not strict with their rules. Though I may give an answer and write aggressively if I were still young and full of teen angst and say nothing bad because those years weren't really rough. But as an adult, who understands motherly and fatherly things sometimes, I know that they just did their duties as parents. I am thankful that my parents aren't crazy parents. Mama just used her hands to spank my butt (and sometimes she'd twist a part my skin but it's my fault anyway for making her super duper mad I guess). Hehehe.

I don't remember I followed a very strict rule at home. It was just full of happiness despite how poor we are :) My favourite rule is probably: to always clean our garden first thing in the morning. I appreciate it because at an early age, they taught me how to be responsible with regards to cleaning my surroundings. Also, I talk to my parents' plants... because Mama said plants listen to stories and it makes them bloom and grow beautifully.

December 7, 2014

Letting go is hard but sometimes if we choose to stay, we'll never see what lies ahead.

This is going to be the biggest change in my life so far. I am moving away to wander around somewhere in the middle. It's been two weeks since I am packing my things and sorting those I will give and will keep. It sure is a difficult task because I have too many things and my list of things to do goes on and on...

The first week was terrible. I got emotional knowing that I am going to leave behind all these things without a guarantee that I am leaving for good. That I am leaving to have a better life ahead, a happier mornings, and most especially to finally achieve these things I wonder all the time. My ideals are great but they sure are too perfect for this world to happen. I always do that. I always imagine. There's peace in imagining great thoughts. It's better to imagine beautiful, too-good-to-be-true things than those of the opposite. Though be cautious not to drown in it.

There's no guarantee. There are definitely hardships that I have to go through in this journey. After all, I am not living in a world just like in the fancy Disney story books. Although I am willing to write and tell my stories of life. Fancy or not. Like I always do. That's a part of my goal: to have time to write a book.

A part of me wants to stay and forget about it. But I keep packing my things like my mind and body really wants to go out from my comfort. Two weeks in and I am still confused as to how this will be. Letting go is hard but sometimes if we choose to stay, we'll never see what lies ahead.

December 4, 2014

Anne of Green Gables by Lucy Maud Montgomery

Don't lose your sense of wonder! Being so inspired by this classic, beautiful literary fiction & being in the real, complicated but somehow beautiful world, all I can say is, just like what Anne said in the last line, "...all's right with the world." How very inspiring this #book is! 5 stars out of 5.
Anne of Green Gables is probably one of the best stories I have read so far in my life. There's something about Anne as a young girl who is very curious of things and very imaginative in all things around her that somehow relates to how my childhood was. That probably is the reason why I am so in love with this book.

It's a children's story book but there are a lot of things an adult could get from this. Some passages speak of positivity that gives you inspiration for the day at least. Anne Shirley is such a brave girl with big dreams and big, big imaginations! Such a great book to read!

"I promise to read the printed word...even when there's a blackout" LOL One of the most annoying things to happen is when you have decided to sit, and read, and imagine the scenes in the #book when suddenly... Flashlight on the go!
 Here are some of the quotes form the book:

“It's been my experience that you can nearly always enjoy things if you make up your mind firmly that you will.”   

Sometimes life surprises us with things we don't expect or given a thought of but it's always a pleasure to embrace it and enjoy it as it last.

“Life is worth living as long as there's a laugh in it.”   

Laughter is one of the best things to being alive.

“Because when you are imagining, you might as well imagine something worth while.”   

“Dear old world', she murmured, 'you are very lovely, and I am glad to be alive in you.”   

“It has always seemed to me. ever since early childhood, amid all the commonplaces of life, i was very near to a kingdom of ideal beauty. Between it and me hung only a thin veil. I could never draw it quite aside, but sometimes a wind fluttered it and I caught a glimpse of the enchanting realms beyond-only a glimpse-but those glimpses have always made life worthwhile.” 

“One can't stay sad very long in such an interesting world, can one?” 

We don't want to stay sad for a whole day or sad for half a day at least. We should just brush off the dust to find joy. We are all discreet beings in this beautiful world. We're all only just dots in the world. Learn the things outside of the box, if you look at it, the space we live in is so beautiful and awesome...the earth, the whole solar system, the solar interstellar neighborhood, the milky way galaxy, the local galactic group, the virgo super cluster, local superclusters, the observable universe! Everything is so lovely and amazing. We are all lucky beings to be alive in this world where we are safe from harm. So there should be no room for sadness. 

December 2, 2014

Rolled Omelet recipe

Rolled Omelet recipe

5 eggs (depends on how much you want; just adjust the rest of the ingredients.)
Fresh milk
Red Onions, diced
Carrots, diced
Spring Onions, chopped
Vegetable oil
Salt & Pepper
Optional: left overs (e.g. grilled fish, meat)

1. Mix everything in a bowl.
2. Heat oil in a non-stick pan.
3. Put just enough of mixture into the pan. Make sure the mixture is not too thick when you spread it around the surface for easy rolling. You will have batches for this depending on the amount of your mixture and the size of your pan.
4. Cook it like how you cook your scrambled egg. Once cooked, gently roll the omelet by using a rubber spatula.
5. Take a chopping board and place your rolled omelet on it. Slice the omelet to make rolls.
5. Serve.

The best way to pump up your favorite scrambled egg for breakfast or brunch! I found this recipe from Eugenie Kitchen on YouTube.

November 30, 2014

Apple Cake by Grandmother Madeleine


Another recipe from Aurelien who lives in Lille, France. :)

500 grams flour
2 eggs
125 grams white sugar
4 apples
1 pinch of salt
500 ml fresh milk

Mix everything in a bowl.
Add apples cut in small pieces
Put in plate
Bake at 175 degrees for 25 to 35 minutes until a toothpick comes out clean.


My first time to bake an apple cake that kind of turned out as a pie! Hahahahahaha it was great! I loved it. Thanks, mon amour, for sharing your grandmother Madeleine's recipe!

A: "Don't forget the most important ingredient!!"
D: "What is it?"
A: "Love."

November 28, 2014

Overnight Sensation by Hal Eisenberg

Finished reading Overnight Sensation by @halacious1! Thanks for the good and easy read, sir. Four stars out of five Also, thanks for these bookmarks and guitar picks which are very useful to me because I have lost mine through the years. More so for the letter... if I were to win the world lottery, I would give you a share so pray for it! Haha Anyway, it is fun to read something that teleports me back in high school -- forming a band, practicing, 'can we really pull it off?' moments, stage fright that slowly fades away when you start playing! We had the time of our lives haha! Thanks #GoodReads #FirstReads
When I received this book in the mail, I got super excited and super curious to read it. Looking at the cover made me think and assume that this will definitely bring back the feelings back in high school when I was all about that bass. I mean, I was part of a band and playing along with my friends (seatmates!!!) back then probably is one of the best memories in my life so far.

This book is an easy read. It's a page turner because it makes you crave more about what will happen next. The story is so unique and every words all clump together to make such a great visual! I like the story and especially how it ended. I think the ending was quite epic! It's such a light and easy read. Very entertaining. :)

Thank you Good Reads First Reads!

November 26, 2014

There was a time when I struggled to speak.

There was a time when I struggled to speak: back when I visited my father who was confined in a room full of beds. No one else was there except me, my father who was sleeping, some nurse from afar, empty beds, and different kinds of machines attached to his body.  I could have said everything I felt rather than just saying I'll go back home.

There was a time when I struggled to speak: when I got back that afternoon from the hospital and found the rest of my family crying in the kitchen. My father died minutes after I got out from the hospital. He was a great, brave man.

There was a time when I struggled to speak: after two years, my mother died. I realized I lost both of my parents. No words, just heavy breaths... and I still feel the same until now.

There was a time when I struggled to speak: when I came home from school carrying a pint of chocolate ice cream and a test paper with me. I could not speak anything but I've had some few breaths in between eating and crying over the test paper result.I thought it was the end of me but I was wrong.

There was a time when I struggled to speak: when I was commuting to school and pretending I have a flu so people won't notice some tears in my eyes. It was when I felt so irritated at home and I've got no one else to talk about it. I could just hug a stranger; if only I could.

There sure were times when I struggled to speak and those times were mostly the hardest things in my life so far. These things remind me that I am strong in times of weakness. These things, though once heavy, delivers strength at the present time. After all the things and feelings I have done and felt, I guess I have lived up to my Word for this year 2014: Brave. I wrote it carefully in my journal and all throughout the months passed, I have done and did things bravely.

At 24, I am still bad at decision making. In fact, I have a couple of things that I do regret but every good and bad decisions I made so far, I did it because I knew it was just the right thing. It's a jigsaw-kind of life and I will keep on finding the missing pieces bravely because that's what life is all about -- the journey.

November 24, 2014

I am leaving soon and I am starting to miss everything

I couldn't sleep tonight. It's probably weird for me to disregard sleep rather than counting sheep until I fall asleep. I was already in bed to finally get some rest but my mind thought a lot of things that I decided to just spend the night awake and spend the time in my room. I'm going to miss this place. These 4 walls... my comfortable bed... my desks... everything in this place. It has witnessed all my emotions, who I am when I am alone, my physicality, my everything... I am counting days until I move away from this place. And I am here, crying like a heart-broken loser. It feels like I am at the verge of breaking up to my long-time relationship. God knows how much I am hurt now but God also knows why I have to move away. And I trust everything in Him. Tears are falling down my cheeks non-stop. And I am going to say it again, I am going to miss this place.

I was at the terrace a while ago and the sky was so clear. Stars were clearly twinkling above me and as I was standing still, the leaves of our coconut trees, along with the other kinds, were swaying along with the cold breeze. The sea was calm tonight. The only thing I heard is the soft sound of the wind until an airplane took off giving me its sound of farewell. I stood still, watching it along with the stars... the lights from the posts in this village, the silent houses at 10 in the evening, the calm sea, the cold breeze... "I am going to miss everything, terribly."

So now... back in my room... crying. Why do I have to leave anyway? Because there is that opportunity. There is no guarantee in it though it's an opportunity I can't let pass. Now I feel like a loser listening to love songs and relate everything about me leaving everything behind.

I am packing my things. Everything in this room will be kept in a box or to be given away... and after a few days of doing some packing, I finally gave in to crying. I was not expecting to do this in my life but I really have to go.

Now that I am finally leaving soon, my mind doesn't stop from giving me flashbacks of almost all memories I have in this place -- from my early years up to now. Oh, how I miss my parents... I miss everyone already that I want to hug everyone and everything in here. This is probably how I am going to feel when I leave earth if a soul could feel at all.

It's the good memories that make me cry tonight. For sure, it's a good cry. But I feel bad... I feel bad because I am leaving such a beautiful place. This is a big change in my life and I am embracing it wholly, for sure. But, opposite to my bravery to embrace the unknown, I feel weak.

I deserve this night to be spent crying and missing everything... I needed this feeling to balance the joy of moving on into a new life! I needed this feeling to remind myself that I am alive.

I wish I am doing the right decision. I need strength.

P.S. I couldn't find the write words to say to describe how I feel at this moment but these: I am going to miss everything in this home since the day I was born -- everything. Oh no, I am going to cry again. Huhuhu

November 23, 2014

French Toast recipe

French Toast recipe (This recipe is originally from A Beautiful Mess.)

Thick slices of french bread
5 eggs
1/4 cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
Corn flakes
unsalted butter

1. Crush the corn flakes. Set aside in a plate.
2. In a bowl, combine and whisk eggs, milk, vanilla extract & cinnamon.
3.  Heat a pan over medium heat with butter.
4. Take a slice of french bread, dip into your mixture of egg and then dip in your plateful of cereals. Shake off excess.
5. Place in the hot pan. Using a spatula, press the bread so it will be fully cooked inside. Cook the other side. Repeat with the remaining pieces of bread.

I served it with some chocolate on top. You can use your favorite syrup for sure ;)

Thank you, Emma of A Beautiful Mess, for sharing this fun breakfast recipe!

November 21, 2014

It is going to be different but fine.

For the past months, I can see a lot of changes around me. For once, I never thought it would come to this. I was raised by my family well and I believe that all my 5 siblings were, too.  We were once a happy group of people though there were some circumstances that would lead one soul (W) away from us. But we did not really left it at that. I know that, as cliche as it may sound, time will heal all wounds and that problem will somehow drift away and becomes just a norm that it would not seem like a problem at all. And things will continue to move on. At least, that's how I see some things around me for the past twenty-four years. Our doors are open for reconciliation. Timing is everything. So there's that hope.

But these past few months, I learned that if there is a problem in the family it does not really seem like a problem at all because I know that everything is fine and there is still that string that binds us altogether. No one is bitter but someone has his pride. But I'd like to believe that everything is okay. And pride will just vanish if he will let it. But for now, everything is okay.

Then there is another one (K) who just recently been part of the family for almost 5 years now. No one really knew that she will destroy the bond we have in the family. She may not seem to know this but for us everything is not going to be the same as before. This is another kind of realization -- that when somebody makes a problem in the family, and that somebody is not really part of the family, it is going to be chaotic. Maybe chaotic is too strong to describe how it is but I want to leave it at that because I've never experienced something else as chaotic as this.

Through my college years up to now, there is that fear of belongingness in the same place. I have a story to tell but I'd rather just drift it away into my memories and rather not write about it at all. But for sure, I want to get out. I want ot experience a life away from here because if I will stay, I will forever remember and live this kind of destruction that somebody has caused.

But then, you know, as cliche as it seems, time will heal all wounds. But I'd rather spend that time away from those who caused too much trouble in our lives. As for now, that is the better way to do it. And I am very thankful to my siblings (ADA), their partners in life, and a few of my relatives for being supportive of this journey to the unknown but I know everything is going to be fine. Different but fine.

November 18, 2014

Chicken Caldereta recipe

Chicken Caldereta recipe

Another meal I cooked for the family of three (me, my sister, and her husband). My sister helped me how to make this! I just made myself the best Caldereta evuuuur because it's less oily than how it is usually prepared. That's probably because I fried the chicken first and not cooked the raw together with the vegetables. I know this blog somehow turned like a recipe blog of some sort but I couldn't really sit down and spend time writing the things I used to write about --which probably is the reason why I am not sane at times. I'll get back to writing once all these things are sorted out.

Ingredients you need:
Chicken cutlets
Canola oil
Red onions, sliced
Cloves of garlic, sliced
Potatoes, diced
Carrots, sliced
Green beans
Tomato sauce
Salt and white pepper
Some REAL pineapple juice
A little diced cheddar cheese

This is how I cooked it (it may differ from the way it is usually cooked, because yolo haha):
1. Boil your chicken in a pot with water for 15 minutes. Fry the chicken in a pan. Set aside.
2. In a new pan, heat up some Canola oil. In medium heat, saute onion and garlic. Once the onion becomes translucent, put the potatoes, carrots, and green beans. Cook until slightly tender.
3. Put the tomato sauce and fried chicken into the pan. Add salt and white pepper to taste. Let it simmer in low heat for 5 minutes.
4. Pour some pineapple juice and sliced cheddar cheese for fun!
5. Let it simmer again for 5 minutes. Serve.

There you go. That's a totally different kind of Chicken Caldereta meal but we enjoyed it! Best served with rice, of course!

November 14, 2014

Palitaw Recipe

Palitaw is a sweet rice cake Filipino treat. It's super easy to make and probably one of the best simple things in life. Hah. It was my first time to make these with the aid of my sister. 

Here are the ingredients we used:
1 cup of Malagkit rice  / Glutinous Rice (rice flour)
1/2 kilo white/brown sugar
1/2 cup water
Grated coconut mean (fresh!)

1. To make a dough, combine the rice flour and water.
2. Using an ice cream scoop or a spoon, take a part from the dough, roll it into a ball and flatten it.
3. Take a pot and fill it with water, bring it into a boil and poach your flattened dough into it. Poach 5 doughs at a time or depends on how big your pot is.
4. It takes about a minutes or so for each dough to cook. Once the dough floats, it usually is a sign that it is cooked.
5. Once cooked, put it into a plate to dry. You can use banana leaf cuts as a plate if you have any.
6. Serve your palitaws with a sprinkle of sugar and grated coconut meat.

You can also toast some sesame seeds if you have any and sprinkle them into your palitaws.

October 31, 2014

Simple Penne Bolognese Recipe

Penne Bolognese recipe! It's one of those days when I feel like cooking pasta for everyone. It was not actually a plan but after sorting out some stuff in my sister's kitchen, I realized that I could cook some pasta. We also made some fresh carrot juice to go with it. It was yummers! Hahaha

So here are the ingredients I used:

Balducci Penne Rigati 500 grams
2 red onions, minced
6 cloves of garlic, minced
Cheddar cheese, or anything you like
Canola oil
Corned beef
Spaghetti sauce 500 milligrams

No need for procedure on how to cook it because, well, you can just ask your mom. Hahaha I am so useless~ *facepalm* Seriously, though, here's how I cooked it:

1. Cook the pasta as to how it is supposed to be cooked. Drain for a couple of minutes. Then, transfer to a plate to be served with the sauce. Make sure it is al dente but, hey, no pressure! ;)
2. In a different pan, put some canola oil.
3. Once the pan is heated, saute onions and garlic.
4. When the onions are translucent, pour the corned beef into the pan.
5. Pour in the spaghetti sauce. Let it simmer. Add salt and pepper to taste.
6. Pour the bolognese into the plateful of pasta.
7. Serve and eat!

Bolognese is probably my comfort food though it's better when it is home-cooked!

October 21, 2014

Why do hateful people exist, though?

I can't imagine my life alone again with these two people. I would rather be dead than to live an unhappy life with them. Life, with them, is a misery. I have sacrificed so many years with them and have wished too many times for a happy life. Everybody close to me knows how much I am suffering yet nobody really tries to pull me out from this rotten place. Nobody. Sometimes I wonder about this kind of life... and I often ask myself, what is the point of living when the people who you think loves you are all miles away -- always going away -- and the people who gives you a sense of unbelongingness is just around the corner? Often I get mad, isolate myself, cry and burst out all the feelings inside, feel okay, force to be happy, find an outlet to achieve happiness, and pray. I did not see it coming. From the moment that my parents left us was the moment I am going to spend my life alone. My grief did not end. I try to always get everything back together to face another day, another month, another year. You know it is true that behind a smiling face is a soul yearning for real happiness. I have survived half of my teenage years without my parents and almost half of my twenties away from those I love. Now, looking back to all those heavy years, I don't think I can ever live another year with the same kind of drama, with the same kind of people, with the same kind of place. I never truly wished for all things pretty... ever since my siblings went away to live their happy lives, the only thing I have hoped for myself is a sense of belongingness; to satisfy my soul with peace, satisfaction, and sensibility. I am so tired... I am so tired to always be the one who gets left behind. Of being fed with stories from my brother's wife about her perfect life and material stuff that do not really matter just so she could make me feel bad about my life. For almost a decade of living this kind of life, of always getting left behind, of always wishing for a peaceful day, I guess it is safe to wish for an infinite time with my parents. I have never wished of dying but during these times of heavy grief, I can't help but hope for death to take its place. Not everyone nor my siblings know exactly how I feel but once I get out of here, and never go back again, that's the time I can say that no matter where I am, what I do for a living, and how much money I have in my bank account do not matter... my life would be better than this because I am away from these two who cuts off my self-esteem. This was once my home before these hateful people existed. This place and these people are not those who can inspire others instead they make others feel bad about themselves. Why do hateful people exist, though?

October 3, 2014

Ever more sensitive to the noises of the world

Through the years, I have stumbled upon thousands and thousands of music via radio, TV, internet, everywhere. Some songs are good, some are okay, some are fine, and some are blah. Some I adore, some I can still sing along to, and some that I barely know the lyrics to but still try to sing it because I don't know why. Most people nowadays say they wish they were born in the past when music was genuine, inspiring, and full of passion. Of course, I agree with that -- I love oldies! Music is better back in the days but there sure are a few of musicians out there who still writes very good lyrics, passionate about music, plays very well, and just plain awesome. One of them would be Linkin Park (Mike Shinoda, Chester Bennington, Rob Bourdon, Brad Delson, Dave Pharell, and Joe Hahn.) These guys are my -- somehow-- savior through the years. From Hybrid Theory up to The Hunting Party, each songs speak to me somehow. These people were there to deal with my teenage angst and these people are still here to help me understand and mature. I know you think this is ridiculous but their songs helped me through a lot of emotional stress. I've never been too vocal about them (not enough, I guess) but I listen and watch them over the internet to feel fine.  They've been here in the Philippines twice but I never really had the chance to go because the venue is too far from me. Soon... I hope! If I were to be asked what is my favorite song of them, then I would probably say all. I can't pick my favorites because all of their songs are perfect for me at least.

Lately, I have been listening to Iridescent mainly because there have been too many heavy feelings in me that I want to let go. It's such a powerful song. It makes me cry~

 I love you, guys. Thank you for the music! You guys are a great part of me. :)

October 1, 2014

Missed Connection: Dr. Mickey Mouse

I won't have any idea what or how a doctor's life is somehow until I have worked for a health care institution for six months. It all started when I had my examination to check if I am fit to work. There were no doctors except you in the outpatient department. The nurse asked if you can spare a little time to check my eyes, heart beat, etc. I get nervous every time I get a check-up. My heartbeat pounded so fast... I thought I am going to fail the test. You asked me which department am I going to work in. I did not get it at first probably because I am so conscious about the things you're writing on my paper while checking my vital signs? But you re-phrased your question and I answered in the IT department. You just nodded then proceeded to write.

Then I started working and whenever I saw you around, I always stared at you (at least for what seemed like 5 seconds). I felt like a creep. Well, I was a creep. It has been two months since my last duty in the hospital but I can still recall the moments that I have seen you around. 

1.) The day you walked in front of me while I was sitting in the waiting area. Those dark circles around your eyes mean you have been working for more than a day, I guess. 
2.) The day I was walking behind you while I was on my way to the office. You looked back and caught me looking at you. I proceeded to walk the other way just because.
3.) The day when we met each other in the elevator. I entered and pushed the 5 button. As the door was moving to close, I heard someone running towards me so I pushed the open button and there you were... smiling and looking at my shocked face. You pushed the 3 button and stood behind me. I did not make any facial movement so you won't see from the silver door but I was laughing inside. 
4.) The day you passed by the office and gave me your clearance. That was the last day we have met.
5.) Some other days when I saw you buying bread or soft drinks... Heehee.

I can not say that I have a crush on you but I felt nervous whenever I see you. It's probably because I am scared of doctors. But you're not the kind who scares me so... I wonder if you passed the exam? You probably have... so congratulations, doc! :)

September 29, 2014

Postcard Collaboration: Postcard # 7 (Hautcharage, Luxembourg)

Red Wedding Shoes
Occasional poetry: D.G. Bersabal
Photograph: J. Utz

Black and red are the colors of the day.
One denotes strength, the other denotes
love. Black and red are the colors
of the day. IT means strong love,
tight bond, forever and ever.

*postcard sent to A. Kalmes

UPDATE: Ms. Kalmes sent me a photo of the postcard!

September 27, 2014

Postcard Collaboration: Postcard # 6 (Mstow, Poland)

Circle poem: D.G. Bersabal
Photograph: 7ns

Your journey through life
does not always happen
on a wide and flat road.
Sometimes you have to
walk on narrow
and rocky ones
to find its meaning.

(written as a circle poem) 

*postcard sent to S. Boral

September 25, 2014

White and Dark Chocolate Cookies

This recipe is written by a french guy (who drinks beer on weekends, lol) and sent over to me! Also he said in verbatim,  "if you want to discover the unknown france, the france not shown in tourist tours, you should go with the only guy in france who doesn't like wine." I don't know what he's trying to say but I think he wants me to tell the internet that he's ready to date anyone who wants to travel in France. Haha! Anyway, here is what's written on it:


125 g butter (I used unsalted)
90 g white sugar
90 g brown sugar
1 bag vanilla sugar (I used 1 tsp vanilla syrup)
200 g flour
1 egg
90 g white chocolate in chunks
90 g dark chocolate in chunks

Mix butter, white & brown sugar, egg, and flour
Add the white and dark chocolates
Make balls a teaspoon size

(Makes 18 balls. )

I am happy with the result. It was crunchy outside and soft, well, no... chewy inside. I actually made a mistake. I just noticed now that I used two eggs instead of one. *facepalm* But it was very good nonetheless! Hahaha! He gave me three recipes to make and I will try to make the other two. It's my first time to bake so there would probably be a lot of mistakes including this one but the point is to learn baking. Excited to bake more!

September 23, 2014

If we keep going back, I guess we're never getting anywhere.

Do you ever think of the years that has passed? I do. In fact, for the past days, I've been pretty much drowned in my old memories. It's all I ever think of. They make me smile and wish I'm still in every moment. Then there are those really bad moments that I wish I did not do at all. But what can I do? They are forever instilled in my memory. Unless, of course, I get amnesia...

Anyway, I've been reading some online stuff a lot lately and here's something that struck me the most. 
“I will not hold the past against myself.” – Your problems, your weaknesses, setbacks, regrets and mistakes teach you if you’re willing to learn, or they will punish you if you’re not.   So let them teach you, every day.  Take everything as a lesson learned.  If you regret some of the decisions you have made in the past, stop being so hard on yourself.  At that time, you did your best with the knowledge you had.  At that time, you did your best with the experience you had.  Your decisions were made with a younger mind.  If you were to make these decisions with the wisdom you have today, you would choose differently.  So give yourself a break.  Time and experience has a wonderful way of helping us grow and learn to make better choices today, for ourselves and those we care for. -- Marc and Angel
I agree about dwelling with regrets. They just become regrets weeks, months, or years after we decided to do them. In the present time, they probably were the best decisions to make or at least. But after a while, when we think about each moments in our lives, each decisions we made, we can't help but point out the "regrets" which definitely makes us feel bad about ourselves. Most of the time, when I'm in that situation, I honestly feel so bad that I get depressed and feel like I'm such bad at life. But if you really think about it, there is no point dwelling on it at all... the point is, we know what we have done. The "best decision" as of the moment could become something we'll regret years after. We will never really know. That's probably how life goes... We make the best decision not knowing how it would seem five years from now, you might regret it later but there is no point on going back to it because if we keep going back, I guess we're never getting anywhere.

September 21, 2014

The Postcard by Tony Abbott

My eight-year-old self would find this story amazing. It's basically about a kid finding a mystery through an old postcard. It's well-written and very intriguing. I like the thrill it gives especially in the last chapters of the book. I love postcards (which is why my sisters brought this for me when they saw it in a book sale) so I was curious about the "mystery within a mystery" story. The Postcard by Tony Abbott is a fun, thrilling, intriguing, and easy read!

September 19, 2014

The One Hundred Year Perspective

"In one hundred years, none of us will be here, not in these lives, in this form. We will leave traces, stories, cells, words, our actions and effect on others passed through people we met who met people who met people, through our children to their children's children. We will be known as the greats and the great-greats, if we are known at all." -- Jena Strong, The Inside of Out.
It's been a year since I finished reading The Inside of Out, which was sent over through mail by the author herself, Jena Strong, and her thoughts are clinging in me still and forever. I told her I was going to make my own version of her One Hundred Year Perspective, but I could not make my words and feelings stumble together because she has written it all down -- she has perfectly written it all down.

This is something I can read over and over. It always reminds me that we are just here for a moment, for a long yet short stretch of time. Everything matters but in the end it only matters in our generation. We are going to vanish and so do our doings but some leave marks, hopefully, good marks, in the hearts of the young.
"In one hundred years, this moment will be long forgotten. But we are here, delivered into its fullness. [...] Even then, there is a lengthening, a savoring of the brevity, this quick lifespan, this breeze between downpours, the atmosphere heavy as if deep in thoughts no one else can hear. And there is really nothing to do but sigh, and sleep, knowing that a radical change will occur overnight: a new day."
We don't know when we'll vanish physically in this world but as long as we're alive please make it a good life. The time we have is limited, short, just a snap... however, make that time matter, at least, in your lifetime.

September 8, 2014

Thoughts before embarking on to another year!

I patiently waited for the clock to strike 12 midnight (and see if there would be any magical changes to happen -- who am I kidding? My soon-to-be 24-year-old self! Ha!). While waiting I wondered, how would this year be like? Being 24 must be challenging for me especially now that a certain thought has been lying in my head for a period of time just waiting to be solely addressed. I knew that I seriously need to practice being independent because life is going to be way too opposite from how it was in the past years. I need to be on my own. Honestly, I've been trying small practices such as taking responsibility to manage, make, and save money. I never knew it would get too exciting. And as the number of digits grew, I couldn't help but get twice as excited as I was just starting. I never wanted to take out all the money I have.

Now that I am in search of another job, I have been making plans on how to invest. It's going to be a new adventure for me. Things are going to be kind of  messy but for sure it's fun. Planning to have a full-time job and an online craft shop could be a good idea! But then again I'm open to more ideas soon. The mission for now is to find a new job for a stable income!

Minutes before midnight, I realized how different my goals are compared to the past years. How timely. I feel like all grown-up. It feels good and scary! I can't remember contemplating over these things at least in my college years. I had big dreams, probably bigger than these, but my dreams right now are all about building a foundation for those crazy bigger dreams! Feels like starting over but this time more justifiable. I don't know how my colleagues are working on their lives... they have probably figured what they want in life. That's good!

Now the clock says it's a new day.... another birthday for me. My 24th birthday. This is it. 24 is going to be a different surprise and I will make it a fruitful year by building a foundation and making quests for life! Happy birthday, self. :)

August 28, 2014

Ice Breaker #3: Self-control is love's strength.

1. What type of partner would you choose for yourself?
     Someone who is patient, hardworking, imaginative, open-minded and has a positive outlook in life.

2. What do you dislike about failure? What can you learn from it?
     It makes me feel so bad about myself and it makes me think that I don't deserve anything in this world
     at all. Exaggerated, I know, but that's usually my initial reaction. After that, I'm good. I accept every
     failure I get and I won't commit the same mistake/s again.

3.  Self-control is love's strength.
      I think self-control is a factor in every good relationship. It is being able to control what you want to
      do and work on what should be done instead. It is being mature. For me, one should practice
      self-control for one to completely love himself or herself because a person without self-control
      is like a house without walls. It's one of the factors that builds a good character, personality
      and relationship with others.

4. What are your limitations and your potentials?
      I am not quite sure of my limitations and potentials because I still have so much to accomplish in life.
      Being young means to throw yourself out of your comfort zone and mingle in it for a long time and
      by then, when I'm comfortable at saying I have experienced a lot, I could say what my limitations
      and my potentials are. But for now, as silly as I may sound, my limitations would be not to enter
      one's life and command what they should do. As for my potentials, I could do everything that comes
      my way! Hahahaha

5. What is helpful to you in coping with stress?
     Listening to music. Not just listening but getting lost in it. There are a couple of songs with really
     great and powerful lyrics that I can get lost into. It feels so good and relaxing to listen to such
     great songs!

August 21, 2014

Fish Escabeche Recipe

I enjoy cooking (who doesn't?!) and sometimes I like taking photos of them. That is if they turned out good or great which rarely happens! Although I admit I am so bad at taking photos of food, not to mention my bad style at food presentation, I still show it off because it's *my* masterpiece hahaha! Like painting a rose but ends up looking like a pink (abstract lol) cotton candy! But I don't mind and so do you. That's me trying to be your perfect chef! Hahaha! 

Anyway, this recipe is called Fish Escabeche. The internet says that the word escabeche is Persian and was brought by the Arabs to Spain. The Spaniards probably influenced the early Filipinos to this dish which is simply a sweet and sour (honey and vinegar) taste with a couple of spices. Escabeche is probably the second easy fish recipe I can do. First being the fried fish, of course! Hahaha!

Fish Escabeche Recipe

Fish, any kind
Ketchup, depends on the amount of fish
Water, half a cup; depends on the amount of fish
Red bell pepper, sliced thinly or however you want
Ginger, sliced thinly
Garlic, sliced
Onion, sliced
Salt, a pinch or so haha
Vinegar, depends on your preference
White pepper, depends on your preference
Sugar, depends on your preference
Spring onion, just not too much hahaha

1. Fry the fish first. Set aside.
2. In the same pan, saute onion, garlic, ginger, bell pepper. Do not over cook!
3. Pour small amount of water (depends on how many fish you have. Just keep in mind that you are not making a soup! So you know how much to put.), vinegar, sugar, ketchup, salt, white pepper. Simmer for five minutes. Add more spices according to your preference. It doesn't need to be too salty though it should be sweet and sour. Add more pepper if desired!
4. Pour the mixture into the fried fish. Add spring onions above for garnish though it also adds a pop of flavor for the recipe! Serve.

Some recipes use corn starch to thicken the sauce but in this recipe I used tomato ketchup only. That's because we didn't have a cornstarch. I think ketchup is a good alternative for it though! :)
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