September 27, 2013

Trip To Kidapawan City

A spontaneous road trip with my sister Rachel and her husband Melbert to Kidapawan City. The two wanted to visit a friend over lunch, which was around 2 in the afternoon at an Italian restaurant, and left after two hours. As much as I would like to show photos of people, I'd rather keep them in my other social media account (Facebook) and post these two photos which I took during our way back to Davao City.



It was great to experience such a spontaneous trip. The spontaneity of it was: my sister knocked at my door while I'm still sleeping, told me to get ready for a road trip to Kidapawan City. It's my first time to wake up to that. And it's amazing. :p

For the sake of making the trip much more memorable, I instantly thought about writing down notes while on the road which is inspired by my aunt who does it almost everytime they go out of town. So here it goes:

10:30 - 11:30: Davao City
11:30 - 12:30: Stop over at Shell, Toril. Bought snacks (Pinasugbo, Mr. Chips, Water, and sanitary napkins). On our way, while still in Davao City, I realized that it was the day prior to my menstruation day schedule (and I'm sorry for sharing this but I guess it's funny to remember this in the future, lol) and I felt that maybe I am already to it. Good thing, I am always carrying an extra pad with me. Haha! Passed by Sirawan, BInugao District, Tagabuli where I saw beautiful views of green mountains!; and Digos City where Alicia Keys' this girl is on fiiiiire played over the radio on the exact time we entered the city.
12:30 - 13:30: Stopped to buy delicious and fresh Bibingka along the road. On to our journey, we passed by an elementary school which has some vegetables growing in a big enough garden in its front yard. Amazing! Passed by Sinawilan, Bansalan where I saw beautiful rice fields, and Makilala.
13:30 - 14:30: We arrived in Kidapawan City! We had lunch over at Capellini Restorante with their friend and her daughter and brother. We ordered different pasta: spaghetti, carbonara, and (mine was) pomodoro;  and chicken meals. Stayed for two hours just talking about anything under the sun.
16:30 - 17:30: Drove back to Davao City.
20:30: Finally arrived home safely. :)

It was a great getaway that lasted for almost a day. Yay for spontaneous road trips. :) Also:

My sister, a photobomber, and me while waiting for our pizza. :D
here is a photo of me and my sister with a guy who almost seemed shocked at something behind us. Or maybe he wanted to make a wacky face, too. 

September 24, 2013

This time of wandering may be the time of discovering.

 Let me just treat my little space as a place for heavy words and narrative feelings as how it was supposed to be during its early years...
 
The last time I wrote something too personal here was about me being too certain about my goal. The only goal that would matter usually right after finishing a degree. I was certain that within the month, I would probably get a job. Or two months maximum. I was all for it. But I failed. I didn't get the job I wanted. Depression kicked in as well as determination but it was crazy. You know that feeling when you feel determined again right after swimming deep into depression? I became doubtful about myself. I gave a shot at it and did my best but failed.
 
I did not do any harmful things. No self-harm, self-hate or anything like it. But there were tears anytime of the day. Mostly, at night. Despite that heavy feelings, I did not give up and I don't intend to. Up to now I am still in search for a job but I am not hoping too much from it. Yes, I know that life after college is not easy. You can not just enroll yourself to something and ensure that you are part of a class for six months up to years. It is difficult unless you are lucky enough to land a job in just a snap. But then again, no work is easy. I wish I knew what I put myself into. I wish I was not too positive only to find out I won't be part of it. It seems like I will never learn a thing unless I try it by experience. 
 
I keep on asking my sister if this work is okay or maybe this one is better but she always says yes to everything. Then I realized, "right, even if I apply for it, there is no guarantee". Get any job you can even if it is not inline with your course, she always reminds me this.  The important thing is experience, she highlights. No matter if the salary is low, she added. The words "keep the cash flow going" always rings in my head at random times. And the word vulnerability seems to coincide with my existence at this moment. 

So I keep on wandering around, being vulnerable in a good way. That is attacking to what's unknown. I am scared to face something I do not know yet but I want to see what is in there and how is it there. Maybe vulnerable is not the exact word but I know my weakness is indulging into something I am not familiar with. So, I go on and on wandering around, connecting myself to different things, going on for a job that sounds new to me. Maybe this time it could be the time of discovering in general. I am scared, excited, feeling strong, nervous, etcetera. I won't expect to something fancy anymore. If it is not for me, it will never be I guess.
 
There is nothing wrong at being too certain about goals for sure but I guess we should not just expect more but expect less or none at all. To anyone feeling hopeless, I hope you are not harming yourself. I think the best way to deal with it, although it could be easily covered by fear (and other factors concerning different outside issues in self, important people, love, etc), is to keep your curiosity towards everything.

September 21, 2013

Postcards sent to Manila, China and France


This is another handmade postcard I made for Sara from China. She likes to travel, read, photography and music so I made her a postcard with all of her listed interest. Weeks after I sent it, she responded through e-mail saying:

"Dear sweet Debie,
It's really a big surprise to have your card this morning,I shall say this is the most lovely card i ever received cause you paint it yourself!
and it's so nice, you are so........sweet. I LOVE IT!
i love photography while till now only with digital machine,i am not an expert on that but it is a really good experience and trying to learn more. i truely believe film photography is much more dramastic, as what you said "MAGIC"! yes! I hope i could have a chance to take film photography someday. and if you could share some of your works with me?
It's getting cooler here these days after nearly one month high temperature upto 45 centigrade which is the highest one in my life. and sunny days with very comfortable feeling now.
I do hope to have a visit of Philippines someday, it's a really nice place with so beautiful landscape. hope soon...
and last but not least
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEBIE!
with my sincere wishes for you and your lovely families!
Sara from Ningbo
Sep 05,2013"
You are the sweetest postcrosser I have ever met, Sara. Thank you. Thank you for letting me know you have received my card and that you like it. It's one thing to make a postcard and send it to strangers and it is another thing to receive a response from them. I know it does not count much but this e-mail amazes me. It's just amazing how you take time to write back through e-mail. Thank you again for giving this fleeting but amazing moment in my life, Sara. :)


Another postcard I made for Aurelien from France. He likes books. I guess he is a fantasy bookworm and geek. I secretly checked out all his books in GoodReads and decided to make a simple compilation of book titles he likes.

 

A birthday stitched card for my sister who is in Manila. I found several free stitched card patterns from Stitching Cards. I glued a little paper card on the flip side, hence that curvy upper right side, which is full of greetings from relatives and close friends of my sister.

I have nothing fancy to give to other people but I am pretty sure a letter and/or a card will brighten up their day. :)

September 18, 2013

A slow and steady walk becomes a sudden fast forward.



I could not believe that it has been five months since I finished college. I thought then that life would get much easier and better but it seems wilder now. Never did I thought that I would shoulder twice as much responsibility once I get out of college. At least not in five months wherein I try to make things easy and slow paced. Although I am still in the "job hunting phase", people seem to challenge me in terms of trust, respect, and conscience at home. They seem to be a test for me to accomplish for later I guess. At least that is how I look at it. I hate to admit what I feel but I think life has been throwing me shit from people whom I thought would be there for me, to fight for me, to believe in me, to be just the family I thought they would be... at least not all of them are like that but most of the people surrounding me right now (and ever since) seem to betray, hurt, and kill me inside. No matter how many times I get hurt so much, I try to keep it inside because I don't want things to get worse. Who likes war? Those with bitter hearts do. Sometimes when I go to bed at night and I can not sleep yet, I wonder what would tomorrow be like. Will it be the same? Or will there be a miracle wherein all things become nice, good, and peaceful? So far, the latter has not happened yet. Maybe it won't ever. So I just breathe deeply and pray. I cry sometimes, too. Because why not? Who does not cry when one is hurt deeply? It is not so bad to let those bad feelings float for a while because it will just hurt more if you just let it sink inside you forever. You have got to breathe them out once in a while. To be honest, I am so tired of dealing with older people who always talk behind my back, who makes me feel unworthy, who makes me feel alone, who makes me feel out of place, who treats me like I am some kind of a little girl who does not know much, who treats me like I am stupid and blurt it out to all the people she meets, who bangs a sliding window, door, or anything near me, who does not promote growth for you, who lets you wither, who lets you do bad things and make it seem good, who is against life and etcetera. But here I am still standing and hoping I could stand for a long time more. Fighting back seems good but even though I try to stand for myself, I realize that she is not worth the energy, time, and effort. Indeed, she is not. What is one person versus a happiness I get by focusing more in life, to other people who are happy, and good things? I read something that goes like be aware of other people's feelings from your actions. This thought has been going on in my head for months now. It keeps me from choosing to do things for the goodness of me and others. It keeps us away from being selfish because we do things selfishly and unintentionally sometimes. It is a good thing to ponder on. I guess it is the time to fast forward and to act professionally. I am more than what I am now and I am capable of flourishing for others as well. It is time to get away, to move away, and to forget all the bad things that has happened, happening now, and will happen later by the same class of people. It is time to forget all those forgiven sins that they have done to me and walk forward, fast and then slow once I they are out of sight. It is time to embrace vulnerability, not to the extent, but enough to move away. Because even though I try to seek things here to make things beautiful and happy, the years have testified enough that there is no genuine happiness here. There will never be. So I move on and bring those happy people and those I trust with me in this journey.

September 15, 2013

Tea: Peach Tea by Twinings


I am a massive coffee drinker but lately I have been drinking only a cup in the morning and rarely a cup at night because I have a bunch of teas (given by my sister) as an alternative. One of the teas I have right now is Peach tea by Twinings. Even though its intensity isn't highly comparable to coffee, its sweetness is just as good (at least as to how I make my coffee or how instant coffee tastes like). I make this tea most especially when I crave for some sweet chips or chocolates late at night. Also, don't you love sipping some hot sweet tea while writing down your to-do list for the next day? Or reading some pages of a book before going to bed? :p

September 12, 2013

Scrapbook 535

I am glad that I bought a scrapbook years ago. It saved me from boring afternoons and too much time worrying about not getting replies from the companies I have applied to. Basically, I just put anything in it. Decided to stick all the letters I have from friends from time to time as well. Just in case I want to bring something with me when I go to North pole or South pole (hahaha!). Scrapbook making is really fun and it handles all important fancy papers I have in one place. Lately, I have been sticking just about anything such as bookmarks, Krispy Kreme art, letters, and others.

  
"33 ways to stay creative" I got from the internet. My mind goes through this list when I feel like I am stuck in something. It kind of helps me get back into where I am supposedly going.


These are some of my bookmarks over the years. First one is from a recollection back in college, a Virgo bookmark, I don't know where I got this one (another bookmark), Horus bookmark that was given to me two years ago by a fellow trainee, a problem solving technique for solving Circuits bookmark. There is another set of bookmarks on the back page.


Two letters from Arielle and Eileen. Photos from Arielle which she got from a vintage store, I guess. I also printed her e-mail about her *mean* girl because I was so sad and the only thing that made me comfortable was to say things on Twitter early in the morning. Arielle is such a sweetheart for sending me her story. It made me feel better then. :)


Some fancy papers I got. A free coffee card from McDo, a cut-out from a layout I made for our final thesis project back in college, an exhibitor ID, and an encouraging fortune cookie.


One hot afternoon was spent coloring this art from a Krispy Kreme box. :p

It's been a while since I've done this humble hobby. There are more blank pages to work on! :)

September 9, 2013

Ice Breaker #1: What was one secret you just could not keep?

 

If I write all my secrets in a tiny sheet of paper, one by one, then I would have a [five gallon] bucket-full of secrets. Most of it comprise of secrets about crushes. Almost all of my friends (and I only have a few so it's okay) know about this. I am the kind of girl who giggles in front of my crush unintentionally and although I always try to think they don't notice it, a part of me wishes they do. And when I am convinced that they do know about this fleeting emotion, I get nervous all the time when they are near my vicinity. It's that crazy part of me. One time I tried to keep it a secret but then I just couldn't because even if I try to stay still and act normal around this particular guy, my friends seem to know what is going on with my mind. They stare at me, sing weird songs to me and give me that meaningful smiles that make me giggle and laugh out of nowhere. So there you go, I am not even talking about one secret rather a bundle of secrets.When it comes to crushes, there's no way I can keep a secret about it.

September 6, 2013

DIY coasters


I made some coasters using flannel fabric, embroidery threads, and *my drawing skills*. The idea is inspired with several hand-made coasters online for two years and finally, finally, I am done with it. I used two colors of flannel fabric: yellow and white; and several embroidery threads. The process in making these coasters are: (1) Draw a circle on a paper (or circles directly on the fabric). Pin the circle on the fabric and cut out the fabric following the outline of your circle. (2) Draw anything you want on the fabric. Show off your drawing skillzz.

 

(3) Start sewing following the outline of your drawing on the fabric. I used two circle fabrics since one sheet of flannel is thin (too soft?) and I wanted it to be kind of thick as well. 

 

(4) Take another circle fabric to cover the flip side. Use glue for a clean surface. You may want to sew around the outline of your coaster to cover the back. Your choice.


So, I came up with these designzz: a flower, a book and an eyeglass, a hot cup of coffee, a slice of Hawaiian pizza, and a swarm of butterflies. I have three more trial coasters designed as citrus and a name.


I worked on them while watching movies or before going to bed over the months. Use it when you have some friends over because it can be a topic starter (!) by a friend who appreciates your stuff. Who knows you'll end up conversing about flowers, books, anything and it can go all the way. :)

September 3, 2013

Heat Lightning


It was around 11 in the evening when I noticed, from my peripheral sight, a spark from the outside of the window. At first I thought someone was taking a photo so I checked. I then realized that it's just a lightning but without thunder, which was weird. I grabbed my camera and went to the third floor to capture a full sight. It was kind of creepy and beautiful in a weird way; the neighborhood was quiet, felt cold wind, the sea was calm and there was heat lightning.

I did not know it's called heat lightning until I researched about it. It's the first time I've seen such phenomenon so I was quite amazed. Or maybe I have taken a glance of it for years and only keen enough to know all about it now? I am used to thunderstorms so I was just curious about the absence of thunder. So I researched... from what I have read, heat lightning happens usually on humid warm nights. You won't hear any sound accompanying it but "if you are listening to an AM radio, you’ll hear crackles of static at the same time you see the flash." (1)

It actually is a distant thunderstorm so there is absence of sound. "The distribution of hot and cold temperatures around a thunderstorm causes sound waves to be bent, or refracted, upward into the sky rather than toward the ground where an observer may be listening. Sometimes the distribution of temperature is so great that any sounds being generated from a thunderstorm pass much too high in the sky to be heard by the human ear." (2)

So that explains it. It's just a normal lightning and thunder phenomena but since they are happening from a distance, the sound gets lesser from my place compared to the exact place where the thunderstorm is (and nearby places). You may wonder why I care to talk about it so much. First, in the recent years, natural occurrences capture my curiosity quickly and that is because bad natural occurrences kept on happening around the world. Second, I want to be an astronomer. Third, I enjoy watching Ancient Aliens! (I admit I imagined something would appear behind those thick clouds while watching it.) Hahaha Earth, despite all the weird, beautiful, and tragic things you do to yourself, you are still amazing.

(1) McLeod, Jaime. "What Is Heat Lightning?". Farmer's Almanac website.
(2) "Heat Lightning A Myth?". Accuweather website.


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